Writing to Impress Rarely Makes a Good Impression
Subscriber Benefit
As a subscriber you can listen to articles at work, in the car, or while you work out. Subscribe NowI remember the sales rep quite well. Eager to make a good impression with a potential advertiser, he talked about his interest in architecture. He gestured at the structure across LaSalle Street and said, "I think that building has a particularly beautiful ‘fah-sayd’."
I knew what he meant; the façade was exquisite. Unfortunately for the rep, the word is pronounced "fah-sahd," with a short a, rather than a long one. Had he said, "The front of this building is particularly beautiful" to our group of non-architects, he would have accomplished his goal. But by choosing another word in an effort to impress us, his efforts actually managed to backfire.
Why mention a simple mispronunciation? Because it illustrates a mistake many companies and organizations make in their marketing and communications materials. Like the sales rep, they try to impress their audiences, rather than simply try to communicate with them. And even if they manage to use all their words correctly, they actually reduce the effectiveness of their efforts.
Most of us start writing to impress when we’re in school. We don’t want the teacher to notice our ignorance or failure to pay attention in class, so we sprinkle our essays and book reports with an abundance of four- and five-syllable words. (By the way, your teachers and professors knew exactly what you were trying to do.)
When we get into the corporate world, we keep using the same approach. We send emails that say "The skew of the data is indicative of nonpossession of appropriate quantities of finished goods pursuant to evaluative criteria suggestive of deficiencies in consumer-driven expectations relative to standard quantifiers reflecting heretofore anticipated degrees of approbation" instead of "Nobody’s buying our product because they think it’s a piece of junk."
Rather than tell customers "Thank you for letting us know that you’re dissatisfied with our product," we respond with emails saying "We appreciate your bringing to our attention what you perceive as deficiencies with our MODEL 329ABI VEEBLEFETZER which you purchased in January."
If you genuinely want to communicate more effectively, you need to stop trying to impress people, and instead focus your efforts on making sure that they understand you. And the best way to do that is to keep your messages simple, ideally by creating them in language that’s familiar to the recipient.
People are often concerned about what’s called "dumbing down." They worry that writing to the audience’s level is somehow insulting. Guess what? Writing so that your audience understands you is kind and humane. Writing in a way that exceeds their comprehension is what’s actually insulting.
Generally speaking, the most effective communication uses simple, widely understood words, and short, simple sentences. They may not be dramatic or impressive, but they’ll be understood by a wider audience. Just as important, they present less of an opportunity for misunderstandings to occur because someone thought that big word meant something else.
In fact, I hesitated before using the word "exquisite" in the second paragraph for two reasons. First, I recognize that not everyone is familiar with the word. Second, it can come across as pompous. But it was the perfect choice for the situation and the sentence, so I let it stand.
Sometimes you have to do that. Whether it’s in the interest of accuracy or precision, a particular word may be the ideal choice. But most of the time, you’re better off using a more common equivalent. In many cases, that simpler word is actually more correct.
Take "utilize," a word that many people choose over "use" because they think it sounds more impressive or formal. "We’re going to utilize radio for this ad campaign." The two words actually have slightly different meanings. "Utilize" suggests that you’re using something in place of something else that usually serves that function. If you have to pound a nail, you should use a hammer; if a hammer isn’t available, you can utilize a screwdriver to do the same thing.
If you want to present the façade that you’re smarter than the next guy or gal, by all means keep utilizing those big words and complicated expressions. Just don’t be surprised when people either see right through you — or even worse, just ignore you. But if you want your audience to see just how smart you really are, keep it simple, and write to connect, rather than to impress.
Scott Flood is owner of Scott Flood Writing.